covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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