Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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