All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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