You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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