Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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