Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
You need a sexual gate keeper
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
