Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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