whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
The best revenge is premature balding
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
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