Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
