"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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