The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
