Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize