I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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