Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
there is glitter all over my balls
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
