Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize