Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize