i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Randomize
