Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
