Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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