Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
