i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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