He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
