Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
