last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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