Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
