whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
