We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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