I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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