she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
