im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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