But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
