I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
you mean i was at the winter classic?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Enjoy the penises
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
