You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
