I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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