hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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