hotel room ftw
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Are my feet made of real feet?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
