she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize