FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
