Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize