Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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