Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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