I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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