whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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