Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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