Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Randomize
