I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
