haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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