WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
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