I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
