Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
