I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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